When a person begins to realize that they don’t fit conventional standards, they begin to feel inadequate but in comparison to whom? Ask yourself, do you want to be like everyone else, or do you want to be yourself? You won’t succeed in being yourself if you try to hide your shortcomings. You will start to feel like you are being yourself if you focus on developing your finer qualities. Any inferiority you feel will be balanced out by your inherent merits. Charm can compensate for a lack of beauty. Self-confidence can compensate for physical defects. The ability to listen can replace the inability to speak freely.
There is just one piece of advice I would give to anyone who suffers from being shy: Guard this quality for the treasure that it really is. Shyness will always have a certain mysterious charm, as long as you don’t play it up into the luxury of being ‘too cool’.
Feelings of inferiority are based on comparison: “I’m not only unattractive outwardly; I have no talents or particular ability. I’m not intelligent or witty and I don’t know how to communicate with people. I’m not worth anything… No, it’s much more serious than that. The fact is that I’m less than they are!”
This type of thinking is an example of a dependent relationship is its purest form. It creates polarization: «They are good, I am bad». Polarization generates the wind of balancing forces, which cause a person to try and raise their artificially understated value in any way possible. Therefore, the person begins to behave unnaturally emphasizing even more, the aspects of self they are trying to hide.
Battling with an inferiority complex can create far more unpleasant consequences than the complex itself. There is only one way to eliminate a complex like this. Stop comparing yourself to others and switch the focus of your attention from your shortcomings to your strengths. Create a positive slide in which your strengths are in such full bloom that your shortcomings fade into the background.